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Is it infatuation or something else?| Khushi Gambhir

We have heard the word infatuation a lot and mostly connect this with teenagers. Infatuation means foolish attachment and obsession but sometimes it gets difficult to understand what was love and what was infatuation even if we are not teenagers. It's a subjective matter and not a fixed variable after all.

How would you rather behave if your beloved has hidden something from you? How will you react when you discover that your partner is hiding something from you? Now the matter to think about is whether the issue is big or small.

I don't think this issue will be small for any husband or wife! Let's see what happened!

Megha and Taran are happily married for the past 20 years. They had a love marriage and have every bit of understanding and compatibility between them. Both are working and are in different fields. Megha is a school teacher and Taran handles a zonal position in the sales and marketing department of a Japanese – Indian based company. Both are doing pretty well in their professional life. They have two little daughters named Siya and Pihu. Overall their personal and proficient life looked sorted before Rahul joined Megha's school. Rahul got placed as the new principal of the school where she works. After their few meetings, they both started going to the cafeteria together followed by being on calls, becoming good friends, and getting close but now the point is that she hesitates to talk about Rahul with her very loving husband Taran.

But also she was in sheer discomfort and confusion about whatever is happening although they only talk and nothing else but somewhere she has started liking his company, thoughts, and spending time with him. Megha was confused about her very own feelings toward Rahul. Megha doesn't want to hide anything from Taran but somehow she is afraid of his reaction.

After 6 months of Megha and Rahul being close friends together, Megha decided to disclose this to Taran and finally did that. The reaction was not pleasing obviously. Taran said a few lines and said "just listen and analyze these before saying anything more!"

"Do you think, we don't have an understanding now after 20 long years?"

"You have felt any kind of emptiness till now ?"

"Was I not being a good friend with you before a husband?"

"How you would have reacted if I were in your place and made a close female friend, having true soft conversations, spending time with her but still claiming that she is just my close friend?"

If I agree also that Rahul is just a close friend then why were you not able to talk the same shitty childish things and enjoy it with me, Megha? Will I not enjoy it you think or I have changed and not the same as before?

Ask your inner self all these questions and then return to me!

Megha was in deep grief! She tried analyzing every statement that Taran asked her to think deeply about.

She finally conceded that what she did was wrong and unjustified.

After few hours

When she went to Taran, she found him to be very upset.

"I am sorry Taran, whatever I did was wrong and is not defensible at all. When I saw it standing in your shoes, I understood how heartbreaking you must have felt but I swear this will not happen from this very moment", Megha said.

Taran was not replying to anything and it was silence going on for the next 15 minutes. "Say something ran please", Megha said.

After those 15 minutes, Taran finally broke his silence.

"See Megha, now what I am going to say…. please listen to me carefully and with my perspective. If this would have been an extramarital affair, anyone would have assumed that a physical bond with another person was also involved. Right? But why only a physical bond is considered an extramarital affair or deception in any relationship? Why deceiving is not seen at the mental and emotional level? YOU HAVE DECEIVED ME. Yes! You heard me right Megha. If everything was good between us, you wouldn't have done that. That fucking Rahul wouldn't have entered your life and actually, YOU LET him come that's why he was able to. Megha, something was definitely off between us! Just think about it damn it. Understanding, comfort, trust, love….. what went wrong between us? I know if everything was really fine, then you wouldn't have got so close to Rahul by heart. I need time to think over this", Taran said.

Months were passing by and Taran didn't utter a single word about this. Megha was over with Rahul, she never kept in contact with Rahul on those terms from the day she told Taran.

After almost 6 months, Rahul said "I have seen that you have realized how and where you were wrong and corrected yourself. I am okay now! Let us officially close this matter but promise me that you will be a friend to me before my wife and likewise. I love you Megha! Always remember this. If you ever feel I will not understand you, try to change your mind, and please come to me and communicate. Communication is important Meghu and I promise we will be as we use to be before marriage. Lots of responsibilities have made us like this, but we should not forget that we are also somebody from the inside. Old us! Childish, crazy, and happy-go-lucky!

“Forgiving needs a big heart and acceptance but not everyone is like Taran. Deception can be emotional as well as physical. Both should be seen as equal. Emotions are of no less value than our bodies. But yes! Every story has a different side and is conditional on the individual's situation rather than a fixed standpoint.”

Khushi Gambhir

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